“Nicky kwani hiyo kipindi imeisha?” (Nicky, has that program come to an end) shouts my sister from the kitchen as the Churchill Show theme song slowly dies away.
It’s a silent Sunday evening. Nothing is amiss, well, except my 3 year old nephew whose source of new torture antics never depletes and I can see him looking at me with one of his signature evil stares with a pair of clippers in hand. He is never this silent unless he has something cooking in that big head of his. I know for sure those clippers will be used on me. But how? Anyway I choose to ignore the little bastard and pay attention to less painful things, like what’s happening on TV.
Today I am glad this kid is not seated by my side gazing at that light box with a glass front or else I’d have to answer endless questions.
You see, the content being aired nowadays from 8:30PM-9PM on local channels is a tad too… uhm… Interesting. By content, I am referring to commercials in this context.
The Churchill show is on a commercial break, an even before the theme song dies away, that demented guy with extremely large eyeglasses that would easily pass for diving gear and a very weird costume pops up from nowhere.
Yes. You got it right. The Trust Condoms ad. It doesn’t run for long, but it sure as hell makes carrying a condom around look (and feel) great. Not that I have a problem with the ad. Or maybe I do, more so if it is aired when I am in the company of a human who’d donate years to me for us to be age mates.
But when it keeps showing up after every 10 minutes in a span of 30 minutes, it starts bothering me. It becomes annoying. I get it already for fucks sake! Whatever happened to abstinence. *cough*
But luckily for me, there’s a sagacious fellow on the other end who can smell my disgust for the already over replayed ad, so I am given an alternative.
The flying doctors ad.
And now a very innocent kid has been dragged into the muck of TV commercials. She explains how she fell and got hurt while playing at “Babu’s” compound upcountry resulting to her getting airlifted by a team of very “friendly” doctors to Nairobi for specialized treatment. Well, good for you little one. But over half of the people watching you are wondering why doctors are flying instead of attending to those in a hospital a mile away.
For some reason, this ad does not get as much airtime as the previous one. May be the money paid for it didn’t get it as much airtime, or maybe there are less accidents at “Babu’s” compared to those in beds (and brothels). But that’s none of my business.
On to the next! This one cis my favorite.
The Vodka ad. Yes! Vodoski is now live on telly. Ha-ha!
God! How this idiots glorify the bottle will make the pope want to taste something stronger than wine. The diction in these Vodka ads drives me into believing they have a brilliant director (who chose directing over writing). Then the shots are just magnificent. So crisp and well angled, pardon the pun, they’ll make you want to rush to the local and get one for the fridge.
By the time all these ads are done, there’s only enough time for Churchill to wind up his show before 9PM news kick off. And as always, we’ll get to enjoy the eye candy…Sorry, TV sirens! Oh wait! I actually meant news anchors. Pardon me… that will grace living rooms countrywide for the next 45 minutes or so.
Dope!!
truly said.
Brilliant
Thank you
I appreciate
Awesome..
nice one..
You inspiring aspiring n growing writers… Love the articles
I am humbled. Thank you ☺